Thursday, January 22, 2009

Tips and Techniques to Get Ex Boyfriend Back

Do you want to get ex boyfriend back? Are you
reeling from his desire to call the
relationship quits? Do you have an empty place
in your heart – and in your life – where he used
to be? Here are some tips and techniques to get
ex boyfriend back.


First of all, whatever you do, don’t chase him.
This means lay off the texts, the phone calls,
and the stalking. Don’t just show up where he
happens to be. This stalking behavior will just
turn him off. He’s got to want to come back to
you, not the other way around. That’s the only
way to get ex boyfriend back.

Instead of pursuing him, start to work on you.
In order to get ex boyfriend back, you need to
become a more positive person. You probably
have many negative emotions right now including
loss and hurt. You need to purge these feelings
and get back on a positive note.

One way to do this is to write a long letter to
your boyfriend talking about all of the good times
you had, all of the hurts you experienced, and all
of the things you wished you had told him. Once
you have poured your heart out on paper, burn the
letter. That’s right. Whatever you do, DON’T SEND
THE LETTER. Instead, light a match and watch the
flame consume the paper. This will give you some
closure to that portion of the relationship.

After you have burned the letter, eliminate all
negativity from your life. Don’t let your
girlfriends talk badly about your ex. And, to the
extent possible, be positive about your whole life.

When you do think about the relationship, remember
what made it strong. Think about the good times you
had. If you do occasionally talk to your ex, bring
up the positive experiences and avoid fighting about
the issues that ended it. If you want to get ex
boyfriend back
, you have to remind him what was
good about the relationship.

To this end, focus your energy working on your
strengths. For instance, if your boyfriend always
praised you on being a good cook, take a gourmet
cooking class. Get even better at the things you
are good at.

But don’t neglect your weaknesses either. If your ex
complained about how you were a slob, start picking
things around the house. Make an effort to become a
better person if you want to get ex boyfriend back.

Finally, you should be available – to him and others.
If someone asks you out on a date, accept it. You
don’t have to be head over heals in love with a guy
to go out to dinner with him.

As your ex sees you as a desirable catch, he’s going
to want to get back into your life. By focusing on
the positive and working on your strengths and
weaknesses, you are sure to get ex boyfriend back.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Dealing With Break Up – Causes Break Up Pain

Dealing with break up pain, any way that you
look at it, is not going to be an easy or
enjoyable task. A lot of people incorrectly
believe that they will be able to manage their
heartbreak, only to find out that carrying a
torch for someone after a love affair is a lot
like grieving, at least if you look at the
relationship as having passed on. When it
comes to dealing with a broken intimate
relationship, it is important that you look
past the pain and find a way to survive even
when things seem impossible for the time being.

Relationship breakup puts a lot of people
through fear and misery. Some of the people
going through these feelings have no one in
the world to turn to, and this is why people
suffer so hard from heartbreak in the first
place. Dealing with break up pain all by
yourself can seem impossible at first, but
consider how many people deal with love and
loss in their lives and survive to talk about
it. You too will be able to get over what
feels like a crippling break up, but only if
you are willing to deal with heartbreak pain
the right way, and the healthy way for that
matter.

So why is the pain from a lost love break up
so difficult? Because when dealing with a
break up, it will seem as if you are the only
one who has suffered the kind of pain you’re
going through. It is important that you
continue to try to heal rather than allowing
yourself to give up on the situation.
Dwelling on the painful split from your
lover will not help you, so instead you should
work on getting better and moving on, which
will allow you to stop dealing with break up
pain and start dealing with moving on and
finding someone new, perhaps even someone that
has a better dynamic with you.

* Spend time with your friends and let them help you
get your mind off your heartbreak.

* Don't dwell on the bad feelings, but focus on the
good parts of your life in order to promote healing.

Your friends will probably realize that you're going
through something serious, and they will more than
likely dedicate themselves to trying to help you
through it. If this is the case, don't blow them off,
because going out and spending time with your friends
and the people that you care about will be extremely
helpful when it comes to dealing with break up pain.
Everyone goes through a period where they are dealing
with break up pain, because everyone goes through a
breakup. Rather than allow yourself to suffer while
dealing with breaking up pain, what you should do is
enjoy yourself and work on healing rather than allowing
yourself to become stressed out, overwhelmed or
depressed by your heartbreak.

Can I Save My Marriage – Its Up To You

It is depressing to see many marriages that are in turmoil, and it is especially disconcerting to see them end up as messy divorces, so you may ask how can I save my marriage? Filing for divorce is not the solution for when a marriage has hit its pushing limits. There are a number of solutions that require that both partners to be fully committed in saving the relationship that they have. The first step is counseling, which enables the couple to have a mediator in dealing with their issues.

In addition to professional services, there are a number of different things that can be done to save a marriage, it is not a complicated process and does not require much outside of both parties working towards the common goal. Below are four things that you can take to heart and utilize to "save my marriage" and improve the odds of successfully avoiding divorce.

First, know that the perfect marriage is a myth. Whenever two people are brought together, there will be problems, including the few that can grow into deal breakers in your marriage. This is a natural result of bringing two people together. Even perfect twins differ in likes and dislikes. For the marriage to succeed, the couple must learn to deal with the rough patches and overcome their problems. Seeking perfection will only destroy everything. People make mistakes, work with your partner and overcome the problems you face, and you'll realize it is possible to "save my marriage."

Second, good communication is vital, for when the communication is insufficient; the marriage is doomed to face problems. The most vital thing is to be honest with your partner. Just about every issue and problem can be solved if communication is maintained. The third tip is to accept compromise. Many have made this an art, with good reason. The middle ground that will enable a conclusion to the conflict has to mesh with both parties and their interests before it can "save my marriage." Marriage on a whole is about compromise and knowing that there are times when your spouse will have to give and times when you have to give in order to "save my marriage."

Really, a marriage is about commitment, the fourth tip. Like a car, if it breaks down, you don't abandon the car on the side of the road. The only time you do get rid of the car is when there is no hope. Saving your marriage involves the same level of commitment and working towards making things work, if you ever have a chance to "save my marriage."

Sometimes, the damage to the marriage totals it, and no matter what you do, nothing can change it. Some issues cannot be solved, counseling cannot help. It is in these cases that divorce makes sense. Out side of these cases, divorce is not the answer. Instead, you should work with your partner to solve the issues that plague your marriage, and hopefully you will be able to say that you can "save my marriage.

Sometimes it seems like Magic but they are proper ways to avoid a breakup

Friday, January 16, 2009

Taking Steps To Get Girl Back

When you’ve broken up with someone you care
about you have a hard time thinking of
anything but how to get girl back. If you
truly want this to happen, you’ll probably
have to make some changes. Whatever happened
to cause the break up should be looked at.
Was it something you did, or didn’t do?
Is it something that you can still fix, or
is it too late?

If it was something you did or didn’t do and
you can fix it now, then fix it. Undo
something, or do something you should have
done already. Apologize and make amends.
This alone might not get girl back, but it’s
the first step on the path to getting her back.
If whatever happened can’t be fixed, then at the
very least make sure she knows that you’re sorry
and that you'd change what happened if you could.

Now that you’ve moved past what caused the break
up, the next step to get girl back is to make her
want you back. That sounds like common sense, but
so many people don’t do it. If the relationship
ended with her angry, then you have to show her
the you that makes her happy again. You’re going
to have to be especially patient and forgiving.
Be as sweet as you can possibly be when you talk
to her or see her.

Even if you’re angry at the time or you feel far
from happy, at least show her the most pleasant
side of yourself you can. Make her remember your
good qualities and what she liked about you when
you were happy. If she feels you have truly
apologized for what caused the break up and she
sees your sweet side again, you might be able to
get girl back.

It’s important to pay close attention when you see
or talk to her. Listen carefully and don’t interrupt.
Let her express herself without jumping in and
telling her how she ought to feel or what she ought
to do. You won’t get girl back by trying to boss
her around!

You also need to pay close attention to see if your
efforts are having an effect. Sometimes you can see
that she’s softening to you. She talks nicer when
she sees you, and you have been seeing her more often.
Maybe she even seeks you out more often than she did
before. Or she seeks you out now after ignoring you
for a long time. Your efforts to get girl back are
working!

Because she’s so impressed with how sweet you are,
she wants to be around you more. And that only reminds
her why she wanted to be with you in the first place.
Pay careful attention also if you suddenly stop seeing
her as much as before, or she becomes distant or angry
talking when you see her. That’s a good sign that
you’re pushing and she’s uncomfortable. Take a break
and you’ll have a better chance to get girl back.

Avoiding A Love Break Up

If you’ve ever had your love break up you
know how painful it is. And if you thought
back after the relationship ended, you
probably saw all the signs that you didn’t
recognize before. If you’ll remember those
signs and keep them in mind, they can help
you prevent a break up in the future. And
they can also help you get back together
after a split.

One sure sign of impending love break up is
the lack of physical contact. This doesn’t
just mean sex. If your partner suddenly
stops having an interest in sex, that’s a
good sign that a break up is coming. But
the normal flow and rhythm of a relationship
has times when there’s lots of sex and times
when there’s not much. This is natural.

A love break up is probably on the horizon
though, if your partner stops holding your
hand for no apparent reason. Or he or she
stops putting an arm over your shoulder at
the movies or in public when he or she
always did it before. Any sudden changes like
not touching you much outside the bedroom when
your partner was always very affectionate
before could signal problems.

If it goes beyond not touching to the person
actually becoming uncomfortable at your touch,
then you definitely need to have a conversation
with your partner about what’s going on. Don’t
just assume that because your partner flinched
away from your touch that there’s about to be a
love break up, though. Many things can cause a
person to not want to be touched at any given
moment.

A person might have been thinking of something
else and been surprised or startled by the touch.
He or she might think that your touch signals that
it’s time to have sex, if you’re not very
affectionate except when you want to be intimate.
And maybe your partner isn’t in the mood for sex
now and chose to show you that by moving away from
your touch. That doesn’t mean you’re headed for a
love break up.

Your partner might simply not feel good. Every
change in a person’s behavior doesn’t signal an
impending love break up or even anything wrong
with the relationship. You have to watch them
closely for a while to determine if some behavior
is an occasional thing, something brought on only
during certain times, or if it’s a permanent part
of the person’s make up.

Catching your partner in lies, even what seem like
small and harmless ones, could be a sign of problems,
too. After all, if a lie is small and harmless, why tell
it in the first place? Where there’s one tiny lie, larger
and more damaging lies can grow. Don’t become
convinced it’s a love break up right away though.
People lie about many things that aren’t bad, like surprise
parties and reunions. Your partner might be trying to
keep a harmless and fun secret like that, instead of
scheming about a love break up.

There is a certain Magic to Learning How to Avoid a Break up
Click Here for Help

Your Moving On The Break Up Is Over

Sometimes moving on (break up, loss or other major change)
is difficult. It’s rarely easy unless you’re so glad to get out of
a situation that you can’t wait to make changes and move on.
A break up disrupts your whole life. Everything you do and
see seems to remind you of your ex. If you had many mutual
friends, even going out to keep from going stir crazy can be
difficult.

One of the biggest hurdles you have to face when you’re ready
to move on is your family and friends. If your ex was popular
with your family, you’re going to get tired of questions about
the situation. You must explain to them that you’re moving
on, break up is over, and that you don’t appreciate constantly
being reminded of your ex and the past relationship.

Sometimes this is difficult for family to deal with. They want
to keep bringing up the person in the hopes that you’ll get
back together. You can just explain, “Moving on, break up is
over, that’s that.” Eventually they’ll come around because
they’re your family and they love you. It’s probably going to
be harder to deal with when it comes to your friends.

If you didn’t have many mutual friends, then it should be less
of a problem. But if the two of you often hung out with the same
group of people, then you going alone to be with those friends is
going to seem strange to everyone for a while. And then there’s
the problem of your ex wanting to hang out with the friends, too.
You might even run into each other as you each attempt to hang
out with your mutual friends. This doesn’t mean that it’s
necessary when you’re moving on break up with your friends.
It’s just simply going to be more difficult to maintain some of those
friendships once the relationship is over.

As difficult as it seems, when you say, “Moving on, break up is history,”
you may have to give up some of those friendships. You and your exmay
each have to keep in touch with only certain friends in your group of
mutual friends. Just try to maintain good contact and relationships
with those you’re closest to and allow your ex to do the same with the
others. While this can be painful, it’s probably easiest on everyone
because they don’t have to choose which of you to be loyal to and which
to avoid.

Sometimes the “moving on break up” period is just too difficult when you’re surrounded by mutual friends and so many places to go together. If possible, go on a vacation to get away from the same scenery and people. Take a vacation with a friend who isn’t involved in the situation;
maybe a friend of yours who wasn’t friends with your ex.
This can help you get some perspective. Once you’ve declared,
“moving on; break up over” then if you can take some time
away it can help you a great deal.

When You Have An Ex Boyfriend To Get Back

If you have an ex boyfriend to get back, you
might have already tried several things to
get him to come back to you. You might have
begged, pleaded, promised to change your ways,
and even gone so far as to break up a new
relationship he might be having. It’s important
to remember at all times how you appear to him.
It’s going to be hard to get him back if you
look somewhat childish or scheming.

Try to think of any behaviors like that you’ve
displayed since you broke up, and stop them now.
Whatever you’ve been doing obviously isn’t
working or you’d be back together already.
If you’ve been following him around and showing
up everywhere he appears out with friends or on a
date, your behavior probably seems more like that
of a stalker than someone who loves him. When you
have an ex boyfriend to get back, things you’re
doing to convince him to be with you might be the
things that are keeping him away.

Next time you end up in the same place together,
whether it’s a restaurant or a club, when you walk
in and see him, do acknowledge him. But instead of
going up to him and demanding his attention as you
might have done before, simply say hello and go about
your business in another part of the room, or explain
that since he’s there, you’ll leave to make him more
comfortable. Be nice and polite and simply go. If
nothing else, the change in your behavior will get
him thinking.

When you have an ex boyfriend to get back, doing what
isn’t expected is important if you’ve been trying
unsuccessfully for a while. If you’ve been calling
him 10 times a day, or even 3, stop. Call when you
really need something, not just to rehash why he should
take you back. If you don’t have reason to call, then
simply don’t call. After a week or so, give him a call
just to say hello and that you were thinking about him.
Ask if he’s doing all right, and a few simple questions
like that.

If he starts to sound suspicious wanting to know why you
really called and acting as if all this niceness is just
a prelude to your usual behavior, just assure him you
called because you missed him and wanted to check in on
him. Then say goodbye and end the call on a good note.
When you have an ex boyfriend to get back, you want him
to wonder at the end of such a conversation. He’ll wonder
why you didn’t beg or plead as usual, and what’s going on.


If you’re less comfortable with calling for such a thing,
mail him a card that simply says you’re thinking about him.
It’s important to give him the chance to make a move. When
you have an ex boyfriend to get back, you can’t smother him
with attention and affection but instead let him come after you.

For more Problem Solvers CLICK HERE

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Stop Divorce and Save Your Relationship

If you want to stop divorce, you have to convince
the person what wants to divorce you to give the
relationship another try. This isn’t always
possible, but it’s absolutely necessary if you
have a chance of stopping a divorce. A divorce
can be stopped at virtually any stage—before it’s
filed or just before it needs the final paperwork.
The earlier you stop a divorce, the more likely it
is that the divorce won’t be restarted, at least
not anytime soon.

So to stop a divorce, you must convince the person
to give the relationship another chance. If you have
been begging the other person to give you another
try or pleading for them to get back together with
you, stop immediately. This might seem counterproductive,
as if now that the person has less resistance it
will make it easier for them to divorce you. But
your pleading probably wasn’t doing anything but
convincing them that divorce is a good idea anyway.
Who wants to be around someone who is behaving that
way?

If you can start acting more mature and behave in a
more pleasant manner, it might surprise the other
person and help stop divorce. Explain that you really
don’t want the divorce and you want another chance in
a calm way. The person already knows this so you
screaming or carrying on won’t help your chances.
Just make it clear that you’re hurt and very sad,
and you really want another chance. You might be
surprised how the other person reacts when you change
your behavior.

You can also show a mature side of yourself that the
other person might not have seen over the last several
weeks and suggest marital or couples counseling to stop
divorce. Counseling has worked for million of couples
and your relationship could benefit from it, too. If
you can get the other person to agree to couples
counseling, then you have precious time before they
file for or attempt to finalize a divorce to convince
them to give you and the relationship another chance.

During counseling you’ll have the opportunity to show the
person why they fell in love with you. You can remind
them why you’re together in the first place. And if you
can show honest effort in wanting to deal with the
problems that come up during the counseling—and many
probably will—that might be enough to convince the other
person not only to stop divorce temporarily, but
permanently.

When you succeed and stop divorce, you must remember
that the person was about to divorce you and it would
be easy enough for them to change his or her mind and
file for divorce later. Having already thought about
divorce and maybe even having gone far enough as to
file for divorce at one time makes the decision to
file again easier. So be aware of the state of
your relationship, and perhaps continue counseling.
It’s easier to stop divorce temporarily than to
have a good relationship for the long term.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Im Still In Love My Ex May Not Be

You might say, “I’m still in love, my ex isn’t.”
This is a difficult situation. First of all, you
don’t really know that your ex is not still in
love with you, too. Your ex may have claimed
to not love you anymore, and that’s possible.
But it’s also possible that he or she still harbors
feelings for you. Many couples who still love
each other very much break up for other reasons.

If you can honestly say, I’m still in love my ex,
there’s a good chance your ex might still love you.
But that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s a good idea
to try to get back together. You broke up for a
reason. Even if you didn’t want to break up and
the break off was entirely your ex’s doing, really
think hard about things. It’s rare that a person
can’t think back and see reasons why the break-up
might be for the best. It isn’t always easy right
at first when you’re still in so much pain from the
break-up, but with time you’ll probably see that the
break-up might even be good for you.

If the break-up was mutual and now you’re having a
hard time because you feel “I’m still in love, my ex
should be here with me,” then it’s even more important
that you examine why you agreed to the break-up in the
first place. Yes, there is a chance that a mutual split
was a mistake. But if you’ll really look back at the
reasons you both had for calling a halt to the
relationship, you might find that’s better to love your
ex from afar and work through the sadness rather than
try to rekindle the romance.

“I’m still in love; my ex even wants to get back
together.”
While this might make you feel very hopeful
that the two of you might be able to work things out
and live happily ever after, don’t be fooled into
thinking that it will be easy. The reasons you broke
up are still there. If you get back together, what
will change? Your relationship might go along well
for a while because you’re both so happy to be back
together.

If you broke up thinking, I’m still in love my ex, and
he or she thought the same so you got back together,
you’ll go through a honeymoon period just as you did
when you were a new couple. You’ll both feel like you
saved the relationship and kept each other from making
a horrible mistake. But that feel-good honeymoon period
will wear off eventually. And then what will you do?

How are you going to prevent the problems that caused
you to break up in the first place from coming back and
making you want to part ways again? Couples counseling
is a good option. If you think, “I’m still in love my
ex and want him or her back,”
then consider counseling
to keep old problems from splitting you up again later.

Friday, January 9, 2009

How To Stop My Divorce

First, if you were the one who made the decision
to end the marriage and now you wonder, how can
I stop my divorce? You should realize that you’re
in a much better position than most people trying
to save their relationships. You’ll need to
swallow your pride and go to your spouse with an
apology. Explain that you acted hastily and that
now you regret it. Explain that you no longer
want the divorce, and maybe even that you never
wanted it but you spoke out of anger and you were
wrong.

This might seem a difficult step, but it’s
necessary. Since you were the one to bring up
the issue of divorce, your spouse might have
started seriously considering and thinking that
it’s a good idea, too. When you want to know,
“How to stop my divorce,” you need to discover
what your spouse thinks of the idea and make it
clear that you were wrong. Unless they’ve had
a lot of time and reason to decide that you were
right and divorce is the best step, you can
probably save the marriage just by admitting you
made a mistake.

If you’re wondering, “How can I stop my divorce
when I didn’t want it in the first place,” then
you have your work cut out for you. You can explain,
without judgment or accusations, that you think the
marriage is worth saving and that you don’t want a
divorce. Chances are that you’ve done this, more
than once. But the way you say it can make a
difference.

It’s important for you to be very mature and calm
about it. That’s not always easy to do. Divorce
is an emotional and painful thing. But it’s one
thing to cry while explaining that you want to stay
married, and entirely another to yell or dissolve
into hysterics. If you scream, accuse or point
fingers at your spouse, you’re giving him or her
even more reason to want to get away from you. If
you want to learn ‘how to stop my divorce’ you have
to let go of the anger and resentment you feel toward
your spouse for ever suggesting it in the first place.

You also have to be willing to work on your problems.
You must agree that the relationship can’t go back to
the way it was, but must change for the better.
Suggest marital counseling. Explain, “I want to stop
my divorce,”
but make it clear you know your spouse
was unhappy with the way things were, and you’re ready
to make them better.



Wednesday, January 7, 2009

How To Get Over Someone You Love

If you want to know how to get over someone you love, you must realize that none of the answers are easy ones. No matter how ready you might think you are to move on and get over that person, that you have to ask how to do it at all shows that it’s going to be a painful process. Sometimes it’s a slow process, too. You might think you’re over someone and a year or two later be reminded of that person and feel all the pain and sadness again. That doesn’t mean you’re not over the person, though.

If you’ve had a lot emotionally invested into a relationship and it ends, it’s something that can potentially make you feel sad for years. Maybe even for the rest of your life. But that doesn’t mean the sadness has to be paralyzing or has to throw you into a depression. By getting over the person, you can realize that losing them made you sad, and look back on it as you would any sad loss. It’s the period of time soon after the loss that should be the hardest, that makes you ask how to get over someone you love.

If the break-up is new, often the only way to deal with it is just to face the pain and ride it out. It’s going to hurt, no matter what you do. But there are some things you can do to lessen the pain. You can remove obvious visual reminders of the person, if possible. Photographs of them can be put away for a while. Gifts they gave you can be stored instead of displayed. You can even avoid the places you used to go together for a while. This tip can be found in pretty much every list that explains how to get over someone you love, so it’s at least a popular idea that’s worth a try.

If you’re really having trouble living your life after the break-up, it might be necessary to seek counseling. Simply explain that you’ve just been through a painful break-up and ask the counselor how to get over someone you love. They can offer helpful advice, and can be more specific that generic lists about how to get over someone you love. A counselor can also probably offer better advice than friends or family.

Your friends and family might feel they know your situation too well. Some may have motives for help you get over the person. They might not have liked that you were in the relationship to begin with, so they might want you to get over things or move on to another person too quickly. With a counselor, though, you can safely tell them things about the relationship you probably don’t want friends or family to even know.

Feel free to go to counseling for as long as you need to.
If the counselor feels you’re spending too much time
dwelling on how to get over someone you love, they’ll
tell you.

If you really want to save this relationship Click Here

Monday, January 5, 2009

Get Your Partner To Agree To Relationship Counseling

Relationship counseling is often a last resort for couples on the brink of the divorce. But some couples try counseling early on when the first problems rear their heads. Counseling is certainly something that a couple shouldn’t be afraid to try, even if the problems are relatively minor. Often, catching small problems early with counseling can prevent bigger problems down the road. Early counseling can even something prevent a future divorce.

Today’s couples seem more eager to try to new things, which makes counseling a good option. Couples married years ago seem less likely to go for counseling or try new approaches, perhaps because it wasn’t something commonly done when they were younger. Very often marriages of 30 or 40 years now end in divorce, which is a shame because they’ll never know if relationship counseling could have helped save the marriage.

If you feel like you need relationship counseling, be sure to as your partner to go to counseling with you in a non-judgmental way. If you ask him or her to go to counseling in such a way as it seems like you are accusing them of being the problem and needing counseling, you’re likely to encounter resistance to the idea. Try to make it clear that you want the counseling for yourself if nothing else.

If you ask your partner to go to counseling because you have some issues you need to work on, they’re more likely to view the idea favorably. Explain that you think you need some help to be able to contribute more to the relationship, and to learn how to be a better partner or spouse. Don’t accuse the other person of need counseling. Even if you believe that they are most of the problem, don’t say so. Once you’re in relationship counseling, they will learn tips and techniques for being better within the relationship, just as you will.

Don’t be afraid to suggest relationship counseling, whether you’ve been in the relationship for 3 months, 3 years or two decades. It’s never too late to try counseling to resolve problems. And it’s never too late to try to keep small problems from becoming big ones. If the relationship is relatively new, you might think that you’re admitting to problems and admitting that the relationship is rocky by suggesting counseling. But that’s not true. But facing any obstacles now, you’re making the relationship stronger in the long run.

If your partner believes that your suggestion of relationship counseling means that the relationship isn’t perfect, and maybe even is doomed, calmly explain that that isn’t true. Just because you’re willing to admit that everything is perfect shows that you’re willing to make necessary changes to keep the other person and yourself happy.

If your partner refuses, go on your own. While the counseling work best if both of you go, you can go and work on things to improve yourself. If your partner sees you going to relationship counseling, they’re more likely to give
it a try.

Heartbroken Poem To Help You Heal

If you’ve ever been through a sad break-up with someone you’ve love, you may have written a heartbroken poem. You may have even written such a poem for things like the loss of a pet or a family member, sadness at moving away from your friends, or any number of sad life events. But it seems nothing inspires such sad poetry as a break-up or divorce. Just as few things inspire love poetry quite like being in a happy, loving relationship.

Poetry is an excellent medium for self-expression. Unless you’re writing poetry with the hope of having it published one day, you can write poetry however you like. It doesn’t have to be good poetry. You don’t have to understand any of the poetic terms or conventions like rhyme, meter or free verse. You don’t even have to have ever read a really good poem in your life to write a heartbroken poem that can help you feel better and maybe help you heal from the pain of a break-up.

An important early step in getting over a break-up or any sad situation is simply facing the pain. While it might feel better to avoid dealing with the reality of the situation, you can’t really move past it without facing it and feeling the pain, at least for a while. So facing up to whatever painful situation is happening is necessary. A heartbroken poem can help you deal with those painful feelings when you’ve split with someone you love.

Don’t worry about whether it’s good or not. No one else ever has to read your heartbroken poem. It’s for you and you alone. Just write down your feelings, as hard as that may be. You can write in plain language. Don’t try to imitate the poets of the 17th and 18th century. Write like you talk, and break the lines where it feels natural to you. In fact, you can start by writing one huge paragraph filled with all your feelings and everything you want to express, just to get it out. Then you can go back and arrange your thoughts and feelings into a poem.

Once you’ve written a heartbroken poem, you might want to write more about different parts of the pain. That’s good. Get down everything you can, and that will help you to face the pain. Writing the poetry will probably be a very emotional time for you. Don’t try to stop it. Just let the pain out and you’ll be better able to move on.

If you decide you want to share your heartbroken poem,
you can show family or friends. Or if you want to
share it but not with anyone you know, you can put it
online. There are websites designed just for such things.
You can upload your poetry for free and let other people
know if you want to receive criticism or not. You might
opt to not receive comments on your heartbroken poem and
just enjoy the fact that you’ve shared your experience.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Dont Wait How To Get Over Someone Fast

When a relationship ends, especially if
you're not the one who ended it, how to
get over someone becomes very important.
It’s not always easy to get over a person
you’ve been with, though. If you’ve been
with that person for a very long time it’s
even harder. It might be pretty easy to get
over a relationship that’s lasted 3 months.
But if you've been with someone for 3 years,
it's hard to get over that person at all,
let alone get over them quickly.
Fortunately, there are some things you can
do
to speed up the process.

When you're wondering how to get over someone,
sit in a chair in your living room or bedroom,
wherever there’s a very strong sense of the
other person. Remove anything that reminds
you of that person a great deal. This isn't
always easy to do, but every little bit helps.
If you've bought a dog together, for instance,
of course you won’t want to get rid of the dog.
But anything your ex bought for you that’s on
display like a knick-knack or something
hanging on the wall would be a good thing to
remove for a while.

If you have lots of things that will remind you
of your ex, you're probably wondering how to get
over someone without making your rooms completely
bare. But even if you picked out practically
everything together, you don’t have to remove
everything to make this work. Just choose items
that have particularly strong memories.

Maybe you picked out the couch together, but it's
one of the throw pillows that you bought or the
figurine on the end table he or she gave you as a
gift that seems to make you feel sad when you look
at it. Remove those items and store them for a
while, just to make things easier on you.

If you’re having a really hard time and feel that
you can handle it, you can think of all your ex’s
bad qualities. Of all the methods of how to get
over someone
, this is the one where you actually
think of your ex the most, so if just the very
thought of them brings you to tears you might not
be ready for this step. Think of the things you
disliked the most about them. If you can’t thing
of anything, just move on. But most of us can come
up with a long list of things we dislike about
someone, especially if they were the ones to end
the relationship.

A popular method of how to get over someone is to
simply start dating again. Many people balk at
this idea—they think they still love the ex aren’t
ready. You can do this even if you’re still in
love with your ex. No one says you have to fall
in love anytime soon. But dating or even going
out with friends isn’t just how to get over
someone, it’s how to keep feeling sorry for your
self while you try.

Here is the Magic to it all

How To Win Back Lost Love

If you’ve had a break-up, you’re probably either trying to figure out how to get over the person, or how to win back lost love. Neither is very easy, but most people fall to one or the other, with only very few able to move on quickly without pining or wishing things could be different. You should really think hard about the relationship and your ex before you do anything. Think about how things were and how they will be now. Try to be as unbiased as you can. You might decide that the break-up really isn’t a bad idea.

If you decide to try to win back lost love, the first step is to apologize. You might think you’ve done this. You might have said you were sorry several times. But if your ex thought you were apologizing just to stop a break-up, he or she might not think the apology was sincere.

If you were the one who did something that you need to apologize for, apologize again. Now they might think the apology is sincere, because nothing hinges on it. If the relationship has ended, you won’t be saying it only to save it but they will believe that you really mean it. (And hopefully, you do.)

When your ex was the one who did something worth apologizing for, then rather than try to get a sincere apology from them, forgive them. You may never forget, especially if your break-up was because of cheating, but you must learn to forgive. Forgiving is much harder for some of us than merely saying, “I forgive you,” though, so you might want to read a book or two on forgiveness and how to really mean it. If you want to win back lost love, this step will help you do it. And it can help prevent problems in the future, too.

If you do succeed and you win back lost love, 3 or 6 or 9 months into the newly patched relationship, old issues might come up. If you haven’t forgiven the person for whatever was done to break up the relationship, then you might have a hard time getting past everything. Old wounds would be reopened and it’s likely that hurtful things would be said.

But if you can truly forgive the person, then there won’t be any need to rehash the past. While you’re working on forgiving him or her for whatever happened to cause the break up, forgive them for the break up itself and you’ll save yourself lots of grief down the road. Also, to win back lost love, show the person the "you" they fell in love with, not the “you” that has been dumped. They were with you because you have certain qualities—kindness, thoughtfulness—not because you’re angry, jealous or hurt. While you might not be able to hide the hurt, concentrate on being the best "you" you can possibly be and you may win back lost love by reminding them why they loved you in the first place.